be careful..people are not always what they seem

[merinass (deleted)]

I wanted to put a little post up about dating on the net..or at least meeting someone on the net. I know we come here hoping to find HIM or HER and the 'net is a great tool for that.
But you know..people are not always what they portray themselves to be.
Let me share with you.
I recently met a person from this site. The emails of course romantic and the promises made ( I always have a wait and see attitude..it isn't real until we are physically together..period) and of course I was open to this but cautious. Mind you..this has been a little over a week. We go from him "I think you are my soul mate" to being pressured to just up and go to his city. Now..we met on here like I said..a little over a week ago. I expressed my hesitance and that I have things in my life I am working on and have to do. I am moving to a new city in two weeks..needless to say..there is no way in hell I can take off for a couple of days. I don't have the time, the money or the energy.Not to mention..this has been only a week long conversation..so why would I up and go after such a short period of time. That is foolishness and can get you into a lot of deep crap.
Tonight I am telling this person what is going on in my life, how optimistic I am about this move and that of course it is going to take a lot of work to accomplish my goals. I am fully self supporting..I don't expect anyone to take care of me..thats not cool in my book.
this person showed me their true colors. They don't want anything to do with me due to the fact I will not hot foot in to Dallas just for them.Not only that, due to their work, they say, they cannot possibly leave right now. Now I ask you..where in sam hell does anyone get off thinking that their work and life is so much more important than mine that I should just drop everything and come running..for them?
Watch out Ladies and gentleman..do be careful. if your gut says watchout then watch out. Between that and being a damn good READER..this guy apparently must think that readings are just for show..it showed him exactly) I was already prepared for what I knew was coming. No big deal.
'Why am I writing this? To add some common sense and a friendly reminder to not believe everything and everyone here. Most of all..if something is striking you wrong..do you really need to know what it is..you know what you need to know..so get on with it.
take care, Be safe and may your Divine keep you
Amanda

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`hello merinass

profiles, pics, words..honesty seems to be a foreign word.. your belly knows the truth. As long as I haven´t found the right one I try to have fun with the wrong ones....which often is difficult but always a lesson.

And true..you are the main person in your life...
straighteyes

[merinass (deleted)]

straighteyes wrote: `hello merinass

profiles, pics, words..honesty seems to be a foreign word.. your belly knows the truth. As long as I haven´t found the right one I try to have fun with the wrong ones....which often is difficult but always a lesson.

And true..you are the main person in your life...
straighteyes

Thank you starighteyes ( neat name by the way ). I just don't want anyone to get taken for a ride or feel that if someone puts pressure on them they may be loosing out. You're not you know.If a relationship started online whether on this site or another or just a random meeting in a chat room really can make it, both partied understand it is not real until you meet..and even then it's a matter of seeing just what is what.
No one has the right to demand you just drop everything and come running..or else you loose out. If that is their mentality then really..they have no idea what a soul mate is, what love is and what working for a better future together is. That is a fact. Anything worth having is worth A: working toward and B: waiting for.
I am a damn good woman. I work hard, pay my bills and do what I am supposed to do. I do what I say I am going to do. I am not a push over and believe me..I can get more offers walking down the street than I care to really think about. Problem is the offerees are just not my speed. I am not worried about it.
Any man worth having is going to have my back..engage in some creative thinking with me and be willing to do whatever he can to work out a meeting..even if it has to be delayed for a period of time due to LIFE..ya know that thing we hit the button and come here to kinda escape it for a while?
I don't expect him to shoulder all the burden..but I do expect him to remember that quite frankly..until we are physically together and a real couple, you only have so much right to input into my life and you certainly do NOT dictate to me what I do with my time, my resources and my heart..sorry this Georgia girl just has a bit more respect for herself than that.

[blackfootedgirl]

`Any one who is honest, would not question your workload and stress of moving ,who hasn't been through that themselves, before, where is his understanding or support. That kind of early behavior of browbeating you into doing what he wants screams possibly emotional abuse later on, I could be wrong. I agree with your last paragraph. Go with that.

[merinass (deleted)]

`Oh no Balckfootedgiirl you are right. I am no young girl anymore and I know what that is. My dad died early this year. If I could take the time off don't you think I would go to my mom instead of a mere man? This fellow knows my dad died in March..where is any thought in his head for anything other than himself? It was never about me..it was only about me in relation to what I could/would do for him. Got news for ya..I am not desperate enough, foolish enough or stupid enough to put romance over my life.That is the great thing about being a truly grown woman. You know where your priorities are and how things should be..and you do it.

[blackfootedgirl]

`Well lets hope he can read as well as he can dictate to you what you are supposed to do with your life, lol! Looks like it is well settled in your mind.

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`merinass, if there is one person on this world who has no trouble with respecting herself and her activities , guess it is me. To enjoy with quality is a right every woman deserves, you start to desrespect when you question your own values. That was all I wanted to say. I am no barbie doll that is messing around on this earth, I am a grown up woman who tries to enjoy what life is offering.

straighteyes

[merinass (deleted)]

`VERY WELL SAID STRAIGHT EYES..sorry about the caps lock button. I don't question my vcalues, but you know I listen to that little bell that chimes when something is not right. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and will trust you until you give me good reason not to.
I know who I am, what I want and am focusing my life that way..a man cannot come between me and the things in life I want. I know that may sound harsh, but my mate would have me as is..and me have him as is..or not at all. I am not a Barbie doll either you play with. I have a life..a lot going on and a man would be the new comer in that. If he wants to share in it..great..if he thinks because he wants to meet me I should drop everything and run..well he needs a little girl and not a full fledge woman.

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`I know, merinass, lots of men seem to need little girls and can´t handle women. They are easier to handle, believe almost everything, do not "question" their partner. But every mature man knows..a woman is the better choice..lol.

straighteyes

[(deleted)]

`Good to see women who think with their minds. To many women say they are in love with someone sight unseen, and will throw their friends under the bus that gets in the way... Never could figure that one out..Then when it doesn't work out they come running back to their friends.Life is too short to play those silly games.
Glad you women are smarter than that!!

[merinass (deleted)]

``..and most likely the reason I am still single!!! LOL no worries though. I just cannot fathom any man ( or woman that would do this to a man, let's be fair here) that expects you to drop and run, sight unseen..you don't know them and on the net..it is just attraction. It isn't real life. You have not had a meal with this person, you haven't walked and talked with this person. You have not just ---- out..done the laundry or whatever..you don't know them. They think I am going to just drop and run for them???LOL not cool..not smart and at the end of the day it shows me they do not know who they are dealing with.
I have done readings in the past about internet romances..and it's sad. I have seen women older than I, men older than I, waiting for over a year to finally meet the person they fell in love with on the net. I can understand if you lived in Europe, had issues with the money to get here or the other to go there and were working on saving it up so you could make the trip. But, you live in the same country..train tickets aren't that expensive at all..ad you don't want to meet? It's sad and these people just keep hanging on..thinking it is real and it just isn't. In love with an illusion. In my opinion you might as well fall in love with a story book character..at least you know how that one ends.

[squinto (deleted)]

`Smooth Operator - Sade

He's laughing with another girl
And playing with another heart.
Placing high stakes, making hearts ache.
He's loved in seven languages.
Diamond nights and ruby lights, high in the sky.
Heaven help him, when he falls.

Diamond life, lover boy.
We move in space with minimum waste and maximum joy.
City lights and business nights.
When you require streetcar desire for higher heights.

No place for beginners or sensitive hearts
When sentiment is left to chance.
No place to be ending but somewhere to start.

No need to ask.
He's a smooth operator,
smooth operator,
smooth operator,
smooth operator.

Coast to coast, LA to Chicago, western male.
Across the north and south, to Key Largo, love for sale.

Face to face, each classic case.
We shadow box and double cross,
Yet need the chase.

A license to love, insurance to hold.
Melts all your memories and change into gold.
His eyes are like angels but his heart is cold.

No need to ask.
He's a smooth operator,
smooth operator,
smooth operator,
smooth operator.

Coast to coast, LA to Chicago, western male.
Across the north and south, to Key Largo, love for sale.

Smooth operator,

[merinass (deleted)]

`Yes Squinto that would be about the sum total of it. Too bad for those that are like that. Age, if we are fortunate comes for all of us. Soon, we are not quite as young and firm as we once were. The wrinkles come and of course the newer, fresher breeds of players and the old ones are on the bench. What are they going to chase then..the world has made them obsolete..not a pretty ending to a life and better them than me.

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`Merinass, they do not end up on a bench..they often marry, never stopping messing around, never realizing how redicilous their hunts are. You know my special kind of humor, so don´t "kill" me for this story. It´s about honesty.
A businessman is sending an email to his wife:
You´ll understand that I have some needs that you are not longer able to fullfill, now that you are 54 years old. Iam happy with you and I appreciate you as a good wife. That´s why I hope that you won´t get this wrong, because after this email you´ll know that I´ll stay with my young 18 year old secretary in a motel. But don´t worry, I´ll be back before midnight."
When coming home he finds a letter on the kitchen table:
" My dear husband, I got your email and I am very thankfull for your honesty.
By the way I want to remind you, that you are 54 years old, too. Same time I want to let you know, while you are reading this letter, I am in a hotel room with Micheal, my tennis trainer, who is 18 years old like your secretary. As a businessman and your good knowledge in maths you´ll know that we are in the same situation...but there is a little difference.
18 is more often in 54, than 54 in 18 and that ´ll lead to the consequence that I won´t be home for tomorrow lunch time....and a big kiss from your wife who is truely able to understand you."

Yes, we are older, we get mature and have already realized that there is only one person who is able to fullfill us at the core..we do it ourself...that´s the way it has to be. Yes, our bottom and our boops got this problems with earth´s gravitational pull, yes, we got wrinkles...but we are so much more than that. What about men, they got the same problems and for the old chasers the earth´s gravitational pull is a bigger problem..they got wrinkles, their body got bulged in a way that does not look pretty cool and they´ll have to put their teeth in a glass one day..just as we do. But we get old and beauty because our beautyness is coming from inside! So, ladies, we got four options..1. we stay in the role of the observer, watching and waiting. 2. We ´ll choose an elder one and might get lost in a physical way. 3. We start to date younger men, because we already know that they won´t grow up anyway. 4. We take the older ones for talking, the younger ones for physically work out? What do you prefer?

straighteyes

[merinass (deleted)]

`Love that joke..I never get tired of it! We all get old and yeah..I have seen both genders act like that..foolish really..blow your youth chasing and then..well they never stop. I mean I suppose that if that is how you want to live then cool..but you know I don't live that way..don't want to and I am content with what I have going on in my personal life..making things the way I want them and doing what pleases me. If I ever meet that elusive HIM..okay..great but if not..my life is still full. A good man would be great, but let's face it..I am not going to overly suffer without one and I feel if you truly lead a life that is full..it isn't too bad..a little lonely sometimes but over all I would rather be alone and content with what I have..what I have worked very hard for..then be some putz who does not see my worth. I will not lower myself like that and I have a feeling that none of you ladies will either. After all..we ROCK..why settle right?
Oh and about the teeth in a jar..heres a weird thought I had..would it not just suck to wake up one day and get the wrong teeth???? Sharing is great but ewww!..sorry..my brain goes to weird places.