Where have all the good men gone/This is not a game to me

[(deleted)]

So I just wondered where are all the good honest Native men out there? Where are the men who appreciate a good hearted, loyal, honest, intellegent and humor filled woman? Where are the men who think a woman's mind, heart, spirit, not just her body or face is attractive? Isn't there a nice Native man out there who is interested in someone to walk hand in hand through life with no matter how easy or hard things might be? I am a bit jaded and tired of the games, tired of being used abused and my good nature being taken advantage of. I will not be put on the shelf and be taken for granted anymore, left to twist in the wind when some man decides that he's ready to move on to the next girl and play those same games with her. Where are all the good men? Looking for a nice, kind, openminded, and clean liveing Native man. To support my dreams as I would support his. To treasure my heart as I would his, and to fill that void only the love of another can. I will fill that void for you too. Where are you???!!!! Just really tired of the games.

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`Oh A.; believe me you´ll find what you are looking for.. but I think not on NAP or TA or First people or another nuts site. Here you ´ll find the cheaters, the fakers, the phoneys, the wannabees etcetc. and a few nice guys..as friends. But the good thing is you´ll find lots of female friends, which is much more important. And you know the other ones do have a real problem.. their brain is so small that they are always loosing orientation..they are so busy with hunting theirselves they can´t show up in your life. Look at me..I am 50 and still struggling around among "no-relationship-material" ..and I am still hoping that one day, when the sun starts to arize in the north...you know the day Utopia is born.. there might be the one who is able to survive me..but as long as that did not happen.. I do my very best in creating my own cathastrophes..and as long as I am able to do so I do not need a man messing up my life..and on the other hand..we do not get what we want we get what we need ...A. do you really want that????Stay cool little diamond!!!

straighteyes

[trubblemaka (deleted)]

`I CAN'T SPEAK FOR ALL NATIVE MEN, GOOD MEN. I HAVE TREID RELATIONSHIPS TWICE, I KNOW ONLY TWICE, AND HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO FIND ANYONE WHO APPRECIATES THE SAME SIMPLE VALUES I DO. SO I DONT HAVE A LOT OF FAITH IN IT. I JUS GO ABOUT MY LIFE, STILL HOPING, BUT NOT REALLY EXPECTING TO FIND HAPPINESS WITH ANUTHA. OH IF YOU'RE WONDERING ABOUT THOSE SIMPLE VALUES, THEY ARE HONOR,LOYALTY, AND RESPECT. AMAZING THINGS THAT SEEM SO SIMPLE THINGS WE ALL SHOULD'VE GOTTEN DOWN AS YOUTHS ARE SO ELUSIVE THESE DAYS.

[(deleted)]

`

There ARE good, kind, honest people out there. The trick is to recognize them without the Physical trappings one fixates on in their head. The idea of what is beautiful, what is desirable NEEDS to be taken out of the realm of the material and placed in the Spirit of a person. What is a 'Traditional' man now? One that digs in the great Plains gathering roots, or the desert Southwest, and rides the stallion with the wind in his long hair while pointing his arrow at the buffalo to take back to one of his wives? The Traditional man now seems to be one who cares for his loved ones, lives with respect for the life around him (all the colors and manifestations of the "creators" expression), and is respected by others for his actions and not his many words. Long hair isn't practical for most men who need to work for a living, and the bow & arrow can be bought at the local souvenir shop. Loin cloths and beads have been replaced by jeans and t-shirts. And white and Natives aren't out stealing each others women and making devoted wives of them..it is now called 'ping' and comes with a pretty hefty prison sentence. All need to rethink the idea of what is the measure of a person. If respect, and honesty and loyalty is what you value..look, those people are around you now. They may just be packaged in human bodies, or working in fields that one didn't read about in Harlequin (oh trubble!) years ago..or see in Last of the Mahicans. But those men and women who are quiet and soft spoken, who maybe have a few extra pounds, and have had some hurts in life but have gained compassion as a result aren't really too exciting and don't capture attention, OR the imagination...except- to the very fortunate few who have the ability to see beauty in what others call ordinary. This is in no way a direction at anyone who posted, or has responded to this post..this post just gives a place for the opportunity to point out what I feel is an important reminder about what one is REALLY looking for. A movie star,a fantasy, to worship, or a human being to love? The choice is an individual one.

[trubblemaka (deleted)]

`::rides up in his best lookin dances with wolves outfit::

[(deleted)]

`I guess the problem I see here is a woman waiting for a man to come riding on a horse, hair blowing in the wind, oh yes don't forget the war paint!! Hey it's not going to happen!!! Stop watching Dances With Wolves and move on with your bad self.. You don't need a man to validate you!!! Maybe you keep being sh@t on because you keep picking the same kind of man!!!
I'm surprised after Brave Heart came out you girls were not roaming the highlands looking for William Wallace, why not he rides a horse, wears war paint...

[trubblemaka (deleted)]

`

[(deleted)]

`THank you Straighteyes for your thoughtful words. Huggeroftrees with all due respect you see wrong. I do not ascribe to the dillusion of muscular, handsome long haired Native men astride his war pony ridding up to take me away with him. I will admit to haveing a thing for men with long hair but this goes for men of all races not just Natives. It's just my thing. So are Native men. It's just a preference. I will agree with what you say about what is Traditional though. I do not see the stereotyped Native man in a breechcloth shooting arrows (Insert other fantasies amd stereotypes here) I understand that no Native walks around the historical traditional dress of their Nation rides horses everywhere or any of the other stereotypes that are unfortuantely still running rampant in people's heads. What I meant by Traditional was everything you said concerning how he cares for his relatives and is respectful of the world and the life around him in all its forms. Along with that though he should know his culture, the language of his people, and take pride in who he is. Again not out of some silly minded fantasy but because I feel it is important to keep those lifeways alive. Perhaps you should not assume that I am seeking a man to validate myself. I do not need that at all. I have just simply reached a time in my life where maybe I don't want to spend it alone anymore. Not every woman who puts these feelings on forum is looking for validation. Some like me genuinely would like to have someone special in their lives it has nothing to do with not likeing ourselves or feeling like something less without someone it's just what we want. I just have a lot of love in my heart and it would be nice to share it with someone. I hardley see why that is cause for peoeple to assume I'm just another white girl who romanticises a people. THe Native people are human like everyone else in this world, guilty of the same failings as me and all other people in this world THey have the same goals dreams and feel as everyone else. Yes I do see a beautful people(Not looking at the phyiscal so much as what's inside) with beautiful cultures and I have a great and deep respect and love for the many and varied Nations/Tribes and cultures. But I am not in any way deluded. I will admit to ignorance, but I am trying to learn and understand. I am trying to lift the veils of ignorance that most people would rather not even bother to cut through. Yes I am still learning. and I am quite sure that I will always be learning. Anyone who says they are finnished learning at anything is sadly mistaken. As for the being s--- on comment that was below the belt. We all know that though there are some really good and decent people on these sites that there are also those whose only goal is to deceive, to feed their egos at the expense of another persons feelings. It's nothing to do with picking the same type of man, but rather just bad luck. If there is anything I'm guilty of, it's being kind hearted. If that is a bad quality then someone please tell me because I was brought up to be an honest and bascily good person. I'm sure I have my faults I am human. Still I think before you presume to say that I am acting out of some dilluisions obtained from trash like the Harloquins or that I've watched Dances with Wolved Last of THe Mohicans or any other movie that focuses on the Native American people one too many times and veiw them as some sort of go to guide for all things Native American you presume too much. My literary tastes are way above those disgusting books and I'm sound enough in judgment and in mind to know that those movies aren't reality. I would still invite you to maybe get to know me before assumeing you know me better than I know myself. I will not do that again though because the last time I did I was met with insults and accusations. Anyway all this being said, is it so wrong to want to have a special person in one's life to share in everything from the seemingly mundane to the truely exciteing? Or is the problem that I am looking for a Native man of any shape or size?

[(deleted)]

`About the post I made above giving my opinion on the original topic posted. That was not directed at any ONE person here, or solely for the author of the topic post. This is a general warning about the pitfalls of looking for love and the very real possibility of missing it if it should show itself because our minds latch on to the IDEA of the person while one thinks on it. This is a public forum for members to post their thoughts and experiences for a variety of people to read. Take what you find helpful and leave the rest then. But it could be useful to somebody right now. I feel that anybody reading this..if you know ANYTHING about me know WHO I AM by now, and should RECOGNIZE what my intentions were --not to harm any person here. Only provide a pause and something that I think is very valid to think on here. Now I will admit that at times my dry humor CAN be a royal pain in the a**..but I am descended from Cherokee princess as you all know! peace.

[straighteyes (deleted)]

`I do not think that we are all off the rocks because of native men. I know A. as a very grounded person who is always looking with her heart and gives a **** on long hair and all the other stuff. I do not either. It was just the fact that there are lots of men on here, specially on here, who are playing around what might give them a little self-esteem in their boring life. When I went online I was so stupid to believe that men on here are honest just as I am..but I learned to face the truth very quickly. I never looked for longhaired Natives, but men who respect the other gender, for men I can trust in, for men with behavior...that was my lack of reality..and if all that creeps I found on my profile represent the "typical" native man.. I prefer to live on a tree and eat bananas.
straighteyes

[(deleted)]

`Hey let me know the tree you'll be at I'll bring some oranges to go with the bananas

[(deleted)]

trubblemaka wrote: `

[johnmarlon (deleted)]

Things are as they are. Despite what my mind lives with, in some way, I'm glad everything is as it is, even though I rarely ever show it or feel it.

[(deleted)]

`Again thank you Straighteyes for your kind words. Also it has come to my attention both from a post by Huggeroftrees and a friend off the site that
that the post I responded to was not necessarily directed at me. Though it sort of sounded like it was. My apologies for the misunderstanding.
perhaps I can make up for it by bringing the strawberries and some pineapple to this fruit themed tree top party:)

[trubblemaka (deleted)]

`::put away his horse and loin cloth::